A Personal Note

You may have noticed (or maybe not) an over 3 month gap since the last newsletter came out.

In part out of frustration with issues I was experiencing with this publishing platform, and also due to just the many distractions life brings—I've been absent from this medium for too long.

Writing here is therapeutic for me, and I hope it's helpful for you. One of the famously and annoyingly difficult traits of ADHD people is finishing what we started. But I'm not going to let the stereotype take hold any longer. At least, not until the next mental break. Because one of the incredible things about resilient people, is we always get back up after falling down.

Life Doesn’t Always Go the Way You Planned

Twelve years ago, I bought my first house.
Ten years ago, I got married.
Seven years ago, I was juggling a full-time IT job, a part-time gig in radio, and running my own business. Everything felt like it was falling into place.

Then, five years ago, the pandemic hit—just a month after my second child was born. The radio station folded, my business dried up, and though I still had my IT job, the shift to remote work and a major company merger brought instability and stress.

A little over four years ago, my marriage unraveled. I ended up living in my aunt and uncle’s basement. That chapter lasted six months before I finally managed to get a place of my own.

Then, a bit over two years ago, I sank into a deep depression. It took months of struggling just to get out of bed, let alone function. Somewhere in that haze, I lost my job.

I found myself facing the unfamiliar and overwhelming world of unemployment and government assistance—alone, exhausted, and ashamed. I was trying to keep it together while barely holding on.

With the help of my doctor, therapists, family, friends, and a community that refused to let me drown, I slowly began to rebuild. I got back on my feet enough to throw myself into the job hunt. I applied for hundreds of positions and landed only a handful of interviews.

Then—finally—something clicked. I got an offer. A full-time position. I accepted, filled out the paperwork, enrolled in benefits. It felt like the clouds were finally parting.

But before I could start, the background check came back.

I failed.
The reason? My credit.

After losing my last job, I had fallen behind on bills. My credit score took a nosedive. And because the job was with an insurance company, they had strict financial requirements. Just like that, the offer was rescinded.

I was crushed. Back to square one.

Back to applying for unemployment, food stamps, and whatever help I could get—often getting denied, then appealing, then waiting. It felt like two steps forward, three steps back. The pressure and anxiety were relentless. Depression clung to me like fog.

It became an exhausting loop: feel hopeless, find a spark of hope, chase it, get let down, repeat. There were days I truly believed I’d never break the cycle.

But here’s what I’ve learned:
Some of the best things in life show up not when you’re chasing them—but when you’re just about ready to give up. When you’ve surrendered the timeline, dropped the expectations, and let yourself just be.

That’s where I am now—not at the finish line, but no longer at the starting gate either. I’m healing, rebuilding, and redefining what success looks like for me. There’s still struggle. But there’s also strength. There’s still uncertainty. But there’s also growth.

And maybe, just maybe, the best chapter hasn’t even started yet.

Embracing Change: How to Navigate Life Transitions and Find Opportunities in Uncertainty

Life has an annoying habit of throwing plot twists right after we think we’ve nailed the storyline. One minute you’re juggling a steady job, a side hustle, and a blossoming personal life; the next, you’re counting ceiling tiles in your aunt’s basement wondering what just happened. If you’ve read my last few posts, you know this isn’t theory—it’s field research.

Below are the strategies that kept me (mostly) upright while the ground shifted beneath my feet. Think of them as road signs for whatever transition you’re facing—career upheaval, relationship changes, or simply realizing your five‑year plan expired three years ago.

1. Pause, Breathe, Name It

Before sprinting toward the nearest solution, hit the brakes. Take a breath—literally. Naming the transition (“I lost my job,” “My marriage ended”) helps your brain file it properly instead of letting it lurk as vague dread. Clarity is the first step toward momentum.

2. Shrink the Horizon

When life blows up, long‑term planning can feel like assembling IKEA furniture in a hurricane. Zoom in. What can you handle today? A phone call? Updating your résumé? Eating an actual vegetable? Small wins compound, and they’re easier to see from up close.

3. Build (or Rebuild) Your Support Squad

Humans are Wi‑Fi—we work best connected. Text a friend, call a family member, or join an online group where “I’m hanging on by a thread” doesn’t end the conversation. Community turns setbacks into shared stories, and shared stories into survival kits.

4. Separate Facts from Feelings

Feelings: I’m doomed.
Fact: I need to pay rent.
Both are real, but only one is actionable. Jot down the cold facts—budget numbers, deadlines, resources—then brainstorm solutions. Emotions get a seat at the table, but they don’t get the gavel.

5. Look for the Tiny Doorway

Transitions often slam one door while cracking open a weird little side entrance you never noticed. Laid off? Maybe freelancing finally makes sense. Newly single? Hello, rediscovered hobbies. Opportunity rarely arrives in a spotlight; more often, it’s hiding behind the storage boxes marked Plan B.

6. Expect Detours—and Detours from Detours

Progress rarely unfolds in a straight line—especially if ADHD, anxiety, or depression ride shotgun. Some days you’ll sprint; others you’ll crawl. Detours aren’t failure; they’re alternate routes. Keep the GPS (Growth Positioning System) flexible.

7. Celebrate Getting Back Up

Resilience isn’t about never falling; it’s about becoming a professional stand‑upper. Each time you rise, mark the occasion—coffee with a friend, a goofy dance in the kitchen, or a victory post‑it on the mirror. Celebration cements progress in your brain and fuels the next climb.

The Upshot

Change is inevitable, uncertainty is relentless, and life still refuses to follow my meticulously color‑coded calendar. That’s okay. Every upheaval carries a hidden invitation: reimagine what’s possible, rewrite old narratives, and discover muscles you didn’t know you had.

If your world feels upside‑down right now, remember this: the ground will steady again. And when it does, you’ll realize that the cracks in your path weren’t just damage—they were doorways.

Keep standing up. I’ll meet you on the next page.

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Mental Break

She mooed.

Until Next Time